Pulling Out

NEPTUNE - As the Empire prepares to celebrate Dependence Day this July 4, planet Neptune celebrated National Sovereignty Day.

Imperial troops withdrew from all major Neptunian cities as Operation Quagmire drew to a close, ahead of the Empire's annexation of the planet, the cause of celebration.

Meanwhile, the Empire built up for a reinvasion of Uranus, a world we invaded years ago.

"We pull out of Neptune and immediately plunge back into Uranus?" said one patriotic citizen. "Maybe we should have finished Uranus before invading Neptune?"

"There's nothing like an invasion to make me proud of my Empire," explained Chancellor Jack, appointed governor of Uranus, "except perhaps a reinvasion."